By Sharon Olanrewaju
Dear Future Husband,
I hope you are fine, because I am not. 👿 I am so not in a good mood and this is not one of those mushy mushy letters girls write to you. Perhaps, I’m supposed to apologize for allowing my first letter to you be borne out of a really bad mood, but I can’t feign it; see, I’m really angry.
It’s Josh! He has really hurt me. Today,He told me he likes another girl. He told me he is sorry he egged me on and he never meant it to be this way… (okay…okay… you don’t know Josh,pardon me)
Josh has been my friend since January last year, my first year in UNIBEN. He is a cool guy – well, was a cool guy – he was also very handsome…*sighs* – still is handsome actually. We became good friends. It was like…like…like magic, but he is the one who liked me first O – I wasn’t even thinking of anything. Well, I liked him too, but he would never have known,I wouldn’t have said anything about it if the rubbish boy didn’t talk first about his feelings for me.
We started making frequent calls, going to the movies, he, in fact, got me a gift on valentine’s day – a cake (everyone knows I always fall for cakes) – a small cake actually. I also spent the last money I had on me to get him a gift, I got him a really expensive cologne and a nice shirt (and Bola was in need of money o, but I spent it on that ..that boy!) I’m sure you won’t want me to insult him ‘cos we are Christians right?
He is a disappointment! I should have known he is that kind of person when he bought me a small cake. How much is a cake?! One small miserable cake!
I really liked him though. I would lay on the bed and think about him, about our wedding day, about the family I’ll have with him, the kids I’ll bear for him… I’m sorry! I really thought he was you, but apparently, he isn’t:'(
No,he definitely isn’t you, because you wouldn’t behave like him right? You wouldn’t egg two girls on at the same time. You wouldn’t treat as cheap a girl who is ready to give her all to you. I know you wouldn’t do that. I’m sure about you.
I was never sure of him. Even when I had admitted to liking him, I still wasn’t sure of him. He actually wasn’t entirely Christian, he was just a cool guy and although I knew it wouldn’t work out between the both of us, I was hoping against nothing that he would change…
I was also tired of waiting. I was tired of waiting for you. I thought I could take some time out, you know? To feel like a girl; be paid attention to by a guy and all that. Josh was a huge mistake, I shouldn’t have bothered.
It’s amazing. I’m kind of feeling better now. I don’t know if it’s writing that has helped or writing TO YOU! ‘cos some people say you don’t exist and that I’m only wasting my time by trying to keep myself for you. They say I’m simply ‘waiting for Gordot’ but, I know there should be you, there should be you, because there is me.
I’m here baby;)
I hope you don’t feel somehow because of all I wrote earlier on. I hope you are not offended I fell for Josh. If you are not consoled by anything, remember I allowed myself fall for Josh because I thought he was you and that means you are on my mind. I didn’t allow him touch me O *Hands up* Although he asked for sex, I didn’t allow him! I didn’t allow him kiss me sef, but he used to hold my hands with affection. I actually like when people hold my hands, especially when I’m tensed – Take note baby😁
You, don’t worry about anything, I’ll kiss you – anywhere and everywhere. I hope you are not a shy person ‘cos honey, I’ll embarrass you with lots of PDA;)
So I’ll be waiting. I’ll keep myself and work on me. I will not allow useless Josh’s into my life again, I’ll be more careful (you have no need to worry) and when you come around, I’m very sure I’ll know it is you.