I watched sternly, eyes widened, as she did her artistic work; hands set, all tools in place, confidence like that of Michael Angelo.
She commanded me “HOLD THE MIRROR WELL!”
I obeyed promptly like a nervous apprentice who is scared her boss could fire her at any tiny fault. I was before a professional artist.
So, here I am, on a topic that has over the last lots-of-months gone from being hot cake to I-don’t-know-what – LGBT.
I’m sure you know that the US Supreme Court has legalized homosexuality in all fifty states of their country – stale story, yeah? I know, so I won’t dwell on it.
You know, often times when I hear or read people give testimonies like:
“I was depressed and tired of life, I wanted to commit suicide. No one cared about me, I was an insignificant part of everyone’s life. Even my family never cared for me. The day I decided I was going to put an end to it all, an end to my life, I was walking down the road and saw this lady who smiled at me. I was so surprised I wasn’t even sure if I was supposed to smile back. I felt so special, at least one person noticed me and gave me a smile; that smile changed my life and because of that I decided against commiting suicide”
I never liked her
I would never admit to being jealous of her though
She always had this gentle smile, the kind seen in the movies – bright
eyes, pink lips,white set of teeth…
You could almost kiss her!
It was just perfect… too perfect.
She’d say a good morning, then accentuate it with her smile, then
add ‘have a blissful day!’
I mean, WHO IN THE WORLD SAYS ‘HAVE A BLISSFUL DAY?!'”
And the smile would always be there.
It was like she did it to taunt me,
I could hear the smile singing: ‘YOU CAN NEVER BE LIKE Me la la la la
la, SUCK IT UP.”
I hate her.
I swear, I do!
Let me start by sincerely apologising to my non-Nigerian readers for, you shall not understand what is going on here. I just have to do this!
Huge hugs for you guys though…
Need I state the obvious reason behind my feeling of over-hypness of this thing Nigerians treat like gold??? It is just cow hide! Cow hide!!!
It has no nutritional value nor any value whatsoever other than to be cooked and chewed and chewed and chewed.
God help you if the cooker of your Ponmo did not cook it well, you wee enterit!
So the other day, I sat by this girl in class who couldn’t just stay out of my space! I mean, the space was just enough for a voluptuous chocolate beauty like me;););), now imagine having someone literally breathing all over my face, talking in my ears and spreading food all over my body!
Why can’t people just man their spaces and not get into someone else’s? Why must you keep touching my arm, stroking my hair and twirling the strap of my handbag between your fingers all because you’re so engrossed in whatever you’re saying and you can’t help but ‘touch something’.
Keep your hands to yourself!
My awesome crime fiction-writer friend Joshua Olanrewaju, the affable LordJosh, invited me and some other amazingly-gifted persons to write for his #30DaysOfNovember trend last November.
We were asked to write on anything “as we see it”… I wrote on colours. Yup, colours! Believe me when I say I’m still suprised with my choice till today!
I’ll let the piece do the talking…
“Life is indeed colouful. We can feel in the pink one day, with our bank balances comfortably in the black, and the grass seemingly no greener on the other side of the fence. Then out of the blue, something tiresome happens that makes us see red, turn ashen white, even purple with rage. Maybe controlling our varying emotions is just ‘colour management’ by another name”
What is it about colours? you’d ask; especially since I am the one writing about them (I mean, what lawyer writes about colours, yeah?)